Building a Support System: You Don’t Have to Do It Alone
We live in a culture that often glorifies independence, praising those who seemingly handle life's burdens alone. While strength and self-reliance are admirable, I've learned firsthand that true strength also lies in recognizing when we need support.
After my car accident, I faced an overwhelming journey of recovery, both physically and emotionally. Initially, I didn't have the luxury of choosing independence—I literally couldn't manage on my own. I had to rely on help, something incredibly difficult for me. There was no proving my strength alone because my circumstances forced me to depend on others. Accepting this help was hard, yet crucial.
It wasn't until I truly embraced the support of friends, family, and professionals, that deeper healing began. Allowing myself to accept help didn't make me weak; it made me stronger. It taught me humility, vulnerability, and the beauty of authentic connection.
One of the greatest sources of my strength and support has been my husband. He is the most wonderful man, my biggest cheerleader, and my unwavering advocate. It took me nearly 33 years to find him, despite having known him much earlier. He supports me in every single thing that I do and backs me in every possible way. He is genuinely the most supportive person I have ever met in my life.
He sees and recognizes the toxic behaviors in my life, especially from my children's father, and how these behaviors have influenced my son through learned behavior. Having him stand by my side through these challenges is invaluable. Finding a supportive partner can be crucial to healing, especially if you choose to be in a relationship. While it's not necessary to have a partner to heal, if you are in a relationship, having that partner be supportive is absolutely essential.
I'm naturally a very independent person, and it is incredibly hard for me to rely on someone else because, to me, it often feels like a weakness. This independence stems from my past traumas—I never want to feel dependent, even when I genuinely need support. Recognizing and overcoming this internal barrier has been a significant part of my healing journey.
Another foundational supporter in my life is my mom. She is one of the strongest people I know and has faced some of life's harshest trials, yet remains the most caring and compassionate person. After my accident, she was fully prepared to care for me in her home to prevent me from having to go into a nursing home. She took care of me for years because I wasn't able to survive alone. Having her unwavering support and love has been absolutely incredible.
Building a support system isn't always easy. It requires courage—the courage to be vulnerable, the courage to trust others, and the courage to ask for help. But once you take those first brave steps, you'll find a community ready and willing to lift you up.
Here’s how you can begin:
Reach Out. Even if it's hard. Even if it's uncomfortable. Let someone know you're struggling.
Choose Wisely. Surround yourself with people who genuinely support you—those who build you up, encourage your growth, and stand by you during tough times.
Be Honest. Share your truth openly and authentically. People can't fully support you unless they truly understand what you're facing.
Embrace Professional Help. Therapists, support groups, and coaches are incredible resources. There's no shame in seeking guidance from those trained to provide it. You can even schedule a session with me. CLICK HERE TO DO SO
Reciprocate the Support. Building a strong support system is a mutual journey. Offer your support to others in their times of need.
Remember, asking for help isn't a sign of failure; it's a powerful act of courage. You don’t have to navigate your journey alone. We heal better together, we grow stronger together, and we rise together.
With love,
Christina